Anal Sex 101
Surprises can be good, but nobody likes a bad surprise. I’m talking about things like surprise math quizzes, unexpected visits from your crazy aunts, or the time when your dentist says, “your mouth looks great…except you’re going to need your wisdom teeth removed.” Dun Dun Duuunnnn. Similarly, there are some exciting surprises during sex, but there are also things that we wished we had the heads up on beforehand.
If you’re considering doing anal, you’re probably busy researching it because you don’t want to have any surprises back there. You want to have the information necessary to help you decide whether it’s worth a try and you want to know how to do it correctly. Agreed?
That’s why I’m here to give you a heads up about anal sex. Anal is one of those sex things that has developed a ~*reputation*~ as being a bit intimidating, but it really isn’t, especially if you’re prepared. Therefore, have a look at these important things to know before having anal sex.
Lube It Up!!
Even if you've stocked up on a few bottles of lube, I want you to go out and buy some more. And if you don't have any, do not even think about trying anal until you have a big bottle of it. No, using lube alternatives will not work in this case. When it comes to doing the actual act. Apply more lube than you normally would. You want everything and everyone to be thoroughly greased. I would also recommend a good quality silicone-based lube. This will last longer and need to be reapplied less often. Remember, the anus is not self-lubricating, so going without is not an option.
Take Your Time
Anal sex is something that you will need to take time to prepare for. Mentally and physically. It isn't meant to be part of a quickie session. If you're thinking about trying it in the 10 minutes you have before you have to go out, save it for another day. Putting anything back there takes time and patience. You cannot rush things or you could actually hurt yourself. Plus, speeding through things isn't sexy or pleasurable.
Too Much? Then Stop!
Repeat after me: There is nothing wrong with you if you need to stop doing anal sex. It doesn't mean that you're a wimp or that something is wrong with your body. You're in charge of the situation and you shouldn't feel that you have to go through with something just because you initially agreed to do it. If you're in pain or you don't like it, speak up. Now. The same advice goes for any other sexy acts.
Might Just Not Be Your Thing
Some people like Smarties while others hate them. The same goes with anal sex. There are people who love anal more than vaginal sex. Then there are those who have tried it once and that was good enough for them. At the other end are people who are perfectly happy never trying it. Whatever works for you.
Slow But Steady
Whether you're playing around with sex toys, fingers, or peens, don't expect that you're going to get them all the way in back there. You might not even be able to make it beyond the tip. And you know what? That's okay. It might still happen 5, 10, or 20 times from now. If that's all it goes in, that's fine. Do not think that you have to force it because that will not result in anything positive.
Communication Is Key
If you prefer to keep silent when you're having sex, now is the time to speak up. If you think it ruins the mood, you're going to have to get over that because you need to say how fast or slow to take things. You don't want your SO to guess or try to read your mind. You need to spell it out so it's comfortable for you. After all, it's your butt where the action is happening.
Things Could Potentially Get Messy
Yeah, yeah, you've probably heard how anal sex can help, erm, loosen things in the pipes. There is potential that it could happen, but it's unlikely that there's going to be a brown explosion every time that you try anal. Just remember that you are dealing with the back door so you want to keep things as clean as possible. It never hurts to lay down a towel and have the garbage can ready. And remember you should never be putting things that have been up a butt in other places.
It Will Feel Very Different
You might think that anal will feel like vaginal sex does, but in a different area. However, it actually has a different sensation entirely. Some people might find it uncomfortable, but the common ways people like to describe it include things like *filled up,* *a very deep sensation,* *and feeling full but in a hot, deep intense way.* Often, the female G-Spot is stimulated during anal sex because of the position. It is a fairly thin membrane that separates the anus from the vagina and the G-Spot can get stimulated through this membrane.
Once In The Back, Don’t Put It In The Front
Simple hygiene. Whether you’re using a toy, penis or fingers. Do not put them into your vagina once they have been in your anus. This can transfer harmful bacteria and cause nasty infections. If you don’t want to go for a wash between the two, an idea is to put on a condom for anal and then change it for vaginal, or have two separate toys.
Watch What You Use
If you are going to be exploring solo or have decided to use a toy with your partner, keep in mind that at the point of orgasm, the anus sucks! Thlooop! So make sure that the toy you use has a flared base or a long handle. You don’t want to be carted off to the emergency room and have to explain to the nurses that you need your favourite vibe removed.